The Ageing List
I was at a party the other day and there were some funny things said about “you know your getting old when……”. It happens to everyone, (thankfully not me yet). These are a few with a BDSM twist on some of the quote. Feel free to add some of your own.
You know you’re getting old:
- When you meet the same new people everyday.
- When the bruises on your butt came from a slide down the stairs.
- When you have to use your cattle prod to recharge your pacemaker.
- When you have to use your favourite cane for walking.
- When your nappy needs changing (but you’re not into age play).
- When going to bed means you want to sleep.
- When you think a Volvo is a cool car.
- When you consistently wake up with your face in your doggy bowl.
- When you quit wearing your teeth altogether.
- When the 60 year old nurse leaning over your bed makes you horny.
- When you forget… (I forgot what number 11 is.)
- When you see a riding crop and start dreaming about horses.
- When your play partner is the same person who gives you a sponge bath every morning.
- When you can no longer make the whip crack.
- When your pony play chariot is a wheelchair.
A Warming Experience
Can I start with saying ‘Hot Dam Hot’
When I think of Chilli, I think of it being used as a food enhancer or a chilli sauce to spice up my food. The same thing can be said with ginger…. do you know where I am going with this?
I never would have thought about it being used as being a tool for others to have a laugh.
As dinner was being prepared, just out of curiosity, Mistress’s partner had a wonderful (……not) good idea. To rub a cut chilli on my clit and surrounding lips (not mouth lips). The first couple of rubs with it, seemed harmless. Then as the disappointment to my reaction was seen on Mistress’s face, my clit then started to become warm, then warmer and in no time then my whole area of clit lips were on fire. No amount of jumping around, spreading lips, blowing cool air on it seemed to stop the burning sensation. In fact in made it worse. I believe they received a few minutes of amusement at my experience. After a while it settled down leaving my clit very sensitive. No bad lasting effects. The only bad bit was not being able to stop that intensity of the burning when it was happening.
